Town Planners hail Pig Flu as Cure to Parking Woes

June 30, 2009 | Leave a Comment

Town planners were seen whooping with glee after it became apparent that Pig Flu would soon cure Woking’s parking woes.

Cyclists Rub it Right in Your Face

June 3, 2009 | Leave a Comment

As the ‘Tour Series Woking’ Event drew to a close yesterday evening, cyclists were able to fly past all the stationary traffic which had built up around the town, smiling and laughing manically at frustrated drivers who had actually been doing some work during the day.

    Woking News Horoscope

    Pisces News

    You will catch a rare fungal infection inbetween your toes. Don't tell your friends, but do see a doctor.

    Aquarius News

    You will be forced to make a difficult decision. Our advice? Choose the donut. The one with the sprinkles.

    Capricorn News

    Start using an electric toothbrush for that dentist-clean feeling.

    Sagittarius News

    This month, the intertwining planets bring you great wisdom. You should bookmark this website and share it with your friends on Facebook. Now.

    Scorpio News

    Learn to fart in tune and you will reap the sweet sweet rewards of life.

    Libra News

    This is a bad month for leaving the house. Maybe consider internet shopping and knitting.

    Virgo News

    You are not spending enough of your life playing addicting internet games. Is this truly your decision, or are you just plain scared?

    Leo News

    A cloud obscures your future this month. It might be good, it might not. It might be cloudy. Things should be just fine, or should they?

    Cancer News

    You should bake a cake. Cover it with sprinkles and love.

    Gemini News

    This month, you must discover the hidden writer within. Why not write an article for a local spoof online newspaper and email it to the editor? If you don't do this you will almost certainly die.

    Taurus News

    Your star sign the bull is making you as horny as a hotdog. Try to steer clear of the opposite gender to avoid turning into a drooling pervert.

    Aries News

    A comet inadvertently flew into Jupiter, your home planet. Beware of unexpected collisions. Is your car insurance up to date?